Behind the green door

Today was the man's test at the RE. It's been a non stop on and off cancelling of appointments and rescheduling since January. You would think I was asking him to get circumsized or something.

Anyway he went because now that I'm Clomid, he has to go to see wassssuuuppppp with the little swimmers so the doc can confidently say that IUI is the right first step.

I'm sitting at work knowing he'll call for directions. The phone rang. Let's just say he didn't want directions.

Instead I got a play by play of what the room was like.

"You know, 2004 Playboys aren't really doing it for me."

What type of porn do they have?

"Ugh...here are the videos....Chasey Lane something or other. America's hottest bartenders."

America's hottest bartenders?

"Yep. Dems the choices. This is going to be a while."

And speaking of Chasey Lane, I haven't heard that name since the early 90s. Is she still alive? By the sound of her website (yes sound), she is.

So anyway. I go to lunch and he calls me back in TWO HOURS and asks if I checked my email. I finally get back to the office thinking he took pics of the video or something.

Nope.

Now, when giving a sample, you have to abstain for a while. Seeing that Aunt Flo knocked on my door, that's 1 week of no action, Jackson. Yesterday he was moaning that he was going to die. I told him to stfu and go to the doc an unload. Leave me alone plus he couldn't so, HA!

Anyway, the pic?

It was a pic of the "goods". A big ol sample cup of goods. I immediately gagged.

It came with the text of " I AM A JIZZMILL GOD!"

That's my man.